I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Randomize
