Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Success! We fucked roommates!
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
