She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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