is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
