I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
