Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
