hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
