You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
