We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Will exercising make me less horny?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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