You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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