If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
