dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize