just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
You are a genius and a whore.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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