I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
