I accidentally burped into my bong.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
