Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Randomize
