you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
