And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
