you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
