no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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