Me too!
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize