He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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