loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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