we have officially lost it.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
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