Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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