is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize