you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Randomize
