i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
