Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i think i have two assholes
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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