I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Randomize
