am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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