Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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