I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
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