Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize