SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
