Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize
