hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
