Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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