I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
