Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Randomize
