I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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