Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
