ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
