Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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