i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
