fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
