the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
