im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
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