next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
it's like iHOP with fire
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
false alarm, still single
Randomize
