Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
